PAGE IN PROGRESS What you see here is a page of my hypertext book POWER of meanings // MEANINGS of power. Initially empty, this page will slowly be filled with thoughts, notes, and quotes. One day, I will use them to write a coherent entry, similar to these completed pages. Thank you for your interest and patience!
Sometimes we go with the flow. We don't make an effort, and that okay. It's okay to recognize limits of our power and relinquish control. And sometimes we go ageist the flow. This can be hard, this is struggling. In this case, we use our power. And this can be also good or bad. Going with the flow and going against the flow is not good or bad in and of itself. Motto in my son's school: "We swim upstream. Go sharks!" - swimming upstream is using power.
Connect to power is about making an effort: Parenting is using your power because it’s making an effort vs. just going with a flow. You don’t go with a flow because you help your children realize how they can use their power, which instead of *them* going with a flow. They need to recognize limitations of their human nature (e.g., it’s easy to want to eat lots of sweat, it’s easy to not share, it’s easy to punch someone when you are angry; it’s not easy yo stop and contemplate how these easy choices can create problems for you later on). Connect to media literacy; explaining to Robin that I want him to watch videos that help him understand himself and the world around them (making an effort) instead of just being entertained (no effort). Being mindful as opposed to being mindless.
Robin and Sky can use self-regulation and they do so very well outside of the house. Everybody think they are the nicest kids. At home they do not always behave well. Why? It takes an effort to self-regulate. Self-regulation is a form of personal (mental) power. At home they do not want to make this effort, so they behave differently.
We can use only individual power, which requires intentionality. I believe that there is misconception that having/using power equals "having it easy". If you think of it, it is when we make an effort to lift a heavy stone, that's when we can talk about having physical power. It is easy for me to pick up a grain of sand, but I do not count this as having power. A lot of things that do not require efforts are just functions of our body, something that we naturally do or need to do to survive or be well. Like walking is a function of our body on the most basic level because if we do not use our legs, we will get sick. It is when I am intentionally make an effort to keep walking that I use my power.
Making an effort requires intentionality, which is combination of awareness and choice. By definition, making an effort means making a self-aware choice to put your energy into doing something.
We can talk about "having a strength", which means being able to make an effort and use our power to achieve a certain result.
Subtle but important nuance: make an effort but not force yourself or shame yourself
Direct vs. indirect effort Sometimes power is more efficiently used by applying indirect effort e.g., in a conflict situation, it might seem easier to use physical power, but using mental power to get to a compromise might get to a more sustainable solution another example: trying to will yourself into breaking a habit, while it might be more efficient to use mindfulness (see Unwinding Anxiety)
when you go with the flow, you don’t use power. Using power equals going against the flow. In the same action we can go with the flow and go again the flow. For example: you go with the flow of your urges but go against the flow in a sense that you overcome resistance from other people/person ; power and powerlessness are mixed
Misconception is that doing things with ease is the equivalent of being powerful. You say, “no sweat” to boast (your power). But, as can in the hat says in the movie on Halloween, you cannot be courageous if you are not afraid. You cannot be considered strong if you don’t sweat. I can carry a sun of sand on my fingertip without sweating, but does it mean that I am strong?
Repeating a pattern is easier than breaking a pattern. People get stuck in behavior patterns, cultures also get stuck in patterns (relationships between people, meaning), the whole society is stuck in patterns as well
Quote from Frost: ““No man can know what power he can rightly call his own unless he presses a little,” - power is connected to making an effort
Question to myself: how can power = life but also power is a synonym of effort (using power requires making an effort)? Maybe because life is a constant battle? You cannot do nothing to stay alive. You need to constantly be doing something. That does not mean that life is only about struggles (“dog eats dog”).